Fighter

It’s not every day that I say this
and given the situation I think it’s important you know.

Our relationship has always been simple.
We don’t always talk but when we do I always enjoy it
sure it’s usually stories I have heard before, but your excitement makes them worth rehearing.
I would listen to them a thousand times over.
And I’ll never tell you that I have heard them before. I probably know them as well as you now.
But the way your face lights up when you tell me about those time with your army buddies in Alaska or how feared the Raiders used to be in the NFL; and the way you laugh like it is your favourite memory, it’s the part I love.

What I don’t love is the distance, the many miles between us.
As you struggle through the many visits to the doctor,
the poke and prods, the questions and lack of answers,
I wish that I could be there for you.

I know you can get through this. You have to.
My faith lies in the fact that I don’t know what I would do without those stories and that laugh.
You have to be alright.

So I hate to ask, because I know you have so much going on
but if you could manage, to keep fighting, to tell me those stories on last time.
You’re my fighter and without you I don’t know how I would find the strength within me to fight through the news.

On Track.

White Rock, BC, Canada

One.

365
The number of days in a year
12
The number of months in that same year
28
The number of days in the ONE month with that
1
Day that makes people feel so alone.

Of all the days, in all the months of a year
how is it that ONE day
can make you feel this way?
That ONE day
can make the roses smell sad, and the chocolate taste bitter sweet?
How is it that, on that ONE day
they tell us how to feel, how to love, how to deal
But what they don’t tell you, because of they did everything would change, is why that
ONE day
makes 364 others seem so insignificant.

But the truth is in the 365 days that make the 12 months become that
ONE year.
So remember to love every day, not just Valentine’s
because 365 is greater than 1.

And that is a fact.

Silence

Sometimes,
When I feel like I’m all alone in this room that once felt small
I feel it.
That feeling of loneliness
Mixed with sadness.
It’s not hard to see what you meant to me with my feelings exposed
Like the empty space where you used to lay.

You know, you never were very loud
More the strong silent type.
But in this big empty room this
Silence.
Without you here is too loud because all I hear
Are the sounds of my tears and my heart as it aches
For MY
Strong silent one.

Questionnaire

Please mark your ethnicity by placing a check mark in the box.

It’s as easy as a simple check mark
Or so they say.
One or the other.
You know who you are; don’t you?

But what about when your life goes against the grain.
When you check two instead of one.
Because you aren’t simple
You don’t fit into only one box.
So what do you check? How do you choose?

I’m starting to realize that I don’t want to choose
To pick one or the other
To fit into one of their boxes.
And while this may bring more questions than answers
This is one question I know the answer to.

I check unique.
I check blue eyes.
I check curly hair.

I am biracial.

Lost

 

Your success inspires me.
Even after all these years I still remember
The times we would sit
I, your lil’ sis, and you, my big bro.

It’s amazing how your life has come together.
I see the happiness in your eyes.
This is what you are supposed to do in life.

And yet,
It brings tears to my eyes.
See the pride I have in you makes me realize
That I am just a tad lost in my life
Searching for my right.
The happiness in my eyes.

Happy

There is a lyric in a Florence and the Machine song that says: “happiness hit her like a train on the tracks,” and while I’m not 100% sure what that feels like it made me suddenly realize that I am happy. It just kinda hit me (like a train! Hahaha). Not that I wasn’t happy before or didnt have moments of happiness but I just realized that while things may seem a little crazy and my life isnt on the exact path that I may have wanted; it’s ok and I’m well, happy. It seems really weird to say aloud (or in this case type) but it is a weird feeling too, to just be happy with your life. 

It may seem like a small thing but I just wanted to get it down, put it out there, and hopefully keep this feeling for quite a while. 

😀

Twenty-Something Confusion

We’re happy, free, confused, and lonely in the best way
It’s miserable and magical.

I hate to do it but sometimes you just gotta suck it up and, quote Taylor Swift. Her songs may be a bit emotional and boy-crazed but I gotta admit there is something there. This line has always stood out to me since I first listened to ’22.’ In its non-sensical ways it makes perfect sense of what your 20s are all about. And right now I feel like this describes what I’m going through. I would say more about it but one, I’m not sure anyone reads (or benefits from) this blog and secondly, I’m not even too sure what is going on myself. I’m going through a bit of a transition period having just graduated and now I’m moving and changing jobs so it is all a bit much for me. So ya, I’m taking solace in TSwift.

That’s all for now.

❤

Getting Craft-y

Everyone knows about Pinterest and all of it’s greatness. While most of the time I’m pin-ing things I know I will never do, I have decided to make an effort to get more craft-y this summer and take on some of the DIY pins I have on my Pinterest page. So I figured why not do a post about the DIY projects I have done so far!

The projects I have done so far have both been Tshirts that I have made for events. I was initially very timid and scared about altering my shirts but I was pleasantly surprised and I’m in love with the results.

DIY #1 – Taylor Swift Concert Tank

Some friends and I decided that we should all wear Tshirts to the the Taylor Swift concert that were insired by her ’22’ video. So we each made shirts saying “Not a Lot Going On At The Moment.” Just like the one she wore in the video! We each painted the phrase on using 3D fabric paint. I then decided to make my shirt stand out a bit more and I cut out a heart on the back. I lined the heart with black bias tape to make it more defined and to help keep its shape.
Here is the final product:

DIY #2 – Fundraiser Tee

For this shirt I did more deconstruction. Once agan I used the 3D fabric paint to decorate the shirt; but this time I cut off the sleeves and the sides of the shirt and tied the ends together. I used it for a cancer fundraiser where I had to run around doing a scavenger hunt.  It was the perfect design because the extra air helped to cool my partner and I down. Take a look!

Like I said before both of these shirts turned out very well and I’m in love with them! I wear my TSwift shirt all the time as a casual shirt and my other shirt is a great addition to my running Tshirts!

If you want to make either of these I am including the YouTube tutorials that I used to make them! They are super easy to make and follow!

DIY #1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t36E05dR8Zo

DIY #2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kaxGC6UBc4E&feature=c4-overview&list=UUSJWlswfVUgyVliZaEFoaBw

Comment below with your DIY summer projects, I would love to hear about them (and maybe even get some more ideas)! I can’t wait to get started on even more!

xoxo

East Coast Adventures

As you may know from my previous posts I like to have little getaways now and then. I think it is great to see something new and experience a new place. I find it kinda cathartic. Well, not the packing (or un-packing) but the rest can be quite lovely. Now normally I stay along the coast, specifically the West Coast, but this time I thought it would be good to mix it up a bit and I headed East. On this trip I visited Toronto, Ontario and Montreal, Quebec – my first time in both cities. It was quite the adventure; from taking the TTC, to staying in an extremely old house I’m pretty sure got me sick, to experiencing a city where I didn’t speak the language; it was a great (although overwhelming at times) vacation! Now enough with the words, let’s see some pictures!

First up: Toronto!

A shot of the CN Tower

Cake from the BEST bakery on Bloor St. called Future Bakery! Yum!

Royal Ontario Museum

Niagara Falls

Next was a road trip with some my favourite people to Montreal! (As an aside, this trip was initially kind of overwhelming as a non-French speaker. It is amazing to see how culturally different Quebec is from the rest of Canada.)

View of the city from a view point on the mountain. So gorgeous!

Cool and colourful side of a building

Old Montreal. Reminded me a lot of the West Coast of Canada. Very pretty here.

So, that was basically my trip minus a few things that were less “picture perfect.” I really enjoyed my time on the East Coast and who knows, maybe I’ll be back sometime soon!

xoxo